This week, EI’s Trisha Gladd takes a closer look at one of our RSMs, the Midwest’s Brett Werner.

In order for dealers to get to know their Regional Sales Managers (RSMs) a little bit better, I was asked to track them down and ask a few questions. The first lucky man of mystery is Exceptional Innovation’s Midwest RSM, Brett Werner.

Brett, 27, has been with Exceptional Innovation for a little over a year. Like all of our RSMs, he works from home. No, not all of our RSMs work from Brett’s home. They are each assigned a region of the United States where they work very hard to bring Life|ware to you, the dealer.

Above: Werner can’t be stumped.

He lives with his wife, Stacy, and their son, Thatcher, in his hometown of La Crosse, Wisconsin. Yes, La Crosse is more than just a game similar to hockey for men who never learned how to ice skate. For those dealers who play lacrosse, ice skating is overrated.

OK, now that we’re all friends again, it’s important to note that Thatcher will be a big brother come December, when Baby Boy Werner #2 will make his debut. Upon further questioning, Daddy Werner refused to divulge the name. It has been deemed a secret, and Daddy Werner does not want to upset almost full-term and possibly very hormonal Mommy Werner.

After a discussion about Brett’s time in the industry, it appears that he is the member of a secret gang of salesmen. Let me explain:

Brett says he was working for a sales company in Colorado four years ago with Keven Fleming (currently, EI’s Northwest RSM) when Keven left to join the aforementioned sales gang of Steve Cashman, Frank Hensley, Jon Thom, and Jeff Mahan at, as they say, another company. After an interview/initiation with Steve, Brett also joined up. When Steve made the move to EI, the rest of the gang soon followed. They now make up a large part of the EI Sales Team.

Luckily for us, they are all nonviolent, and they love Life|ware. And a good steak.

It’s also believed that at least one of their colors is blue as this is Brett’s favorite color; however, he does say that blue is most mens’ favorite color because girls like when men wear blue. Or as he puts it, “We do it for the girls.”

As for the life of an RSM, bitter co-workers sitting in their cubicles dreaming of the ability to conduct business from home in a bathrobe with The Price is Right on mute need not retaliate. Brett says he is very busy and travels most of the week.

Editor’s Note: Life|line apologizes if we inadvertently put an image of Brett in a bathroom in your head. That was not our intention. Make it stop!

He saves Saturday and his favorite day of the week, Sunday, for time with his family (this includes his dog, Thomas, and two cats, Ahli and Binx).

While most women have to share Sundays with Jim Nantz, Shannon Sharpe, and the rest of the CBS Sports Crew, Brett says he’s not much a football fan or any other sport for that matter. Between growing up in Lacrosse and raising his family there, Brett lived in Colorado for 5 years where he was able to live out his passion for skiing and mountain biking. For the majority of us, this means broken bones and frostbite, but for Brett it means fun.

Above: Werner is unafraid to sport Starsky-like shades.

When it comes to Life|ware and EI, Brett has nothing but glowing remarks. “Overall, it’s awesome at EI,” said Brett.

(Whenever there is a trade show) “We get together like we never missed a beat. Always good times.”

(On Life|ware)
“It provides a unique opportunity that other products haven’t,” says Brett. “I like working with the dealers and showing them a new way to do things; showing them a product that is changing the custom electronics industry.”

And of course, a profile wouldn’t be complete without asking Brett if he could have any superpower, what would it be? And, as Brett put it, it wouldn’t be Brett if he didn’t respond in turn.

“You sound like a MySpace survey.”

Hey, at least I didn’t ask him if he had a crush on any of his top friends.

Nevermind.

Above: Werner dreams of flight.

If you’re wondering, Brett would have the ability to fly. So, unless Brett finds a genie to grant him this wish or he is secretly a native of the planet Krypton, you can find him hanging out with his family in the lovely city of Lacrosse or making his rounds to the dealers of the Midwest. Regardless of where he’s at, we’re glad he’s ours. Thanks for your hard work, Brett.

-Report by T. Gladd

What kind of guy he is: The Brett Werner File

Jan. 06, 2007, Las Vegas, Nevada. 7 a.m. 36 degrees.

Werner and Life|line editor Pete Brown are walking from their hotel to Life|ware’s Next Gen home for a day of spreading the word. When Werner peels off to hit a coffee stand, Brown heads off, explaining he has to meet a news crew onsite.

10 minutes later, having passed the news crew on to the appropriate peeps, Brown emerges from the home to find Werner, waiting for him with a cup of java that he sorely needed, but had not asked for.

That’s the kind of guy he is. Even though he’s got him a cat named ‘Binx,’ Werner’s got your back. Or at least your coffee.

Update! Werner Distances Himself from Binx

Upon receiving a request from Life|line for a photo of himself and Binx, Brett Werner today issued a sternly worded clarification of his relationship with Binx, and positioned himself as a dog lover.

I don’t have any pics of me with Binx. You see, he was my wife’s cat way before I was in the picture and rankly he annoys the hell out of me! I do, however, have pics of my dog Thomas who I have had since he was 6 weeks old. I adopted him from the Humane Society, Doberman-greyhound mix, now almost 8 years old. He has been along for some epic ski trips and even ridden the chairlift at Beaver Creek. Here are a couple of pics of him. Notice the one of him in the car – those are icicles hanging from his chin!

I’m writing this post with a heavy heart and am full of sincere apologies. I just learned today that the guy who got traded to Training for a scanner is not, in fact, going to make it to EHX.

Ullmer: Not going to EHX.

This might not seem like a big deal, but I promised you he’d be there and you could, like, go up to him and go “Hey, man. I heard you got traded to Training for a scanner,” and then watch his ears get red (it’s always good times), but today, I was like “When are you flying down for EHX?” and he was like “I’m not going to EHX” and I was like, “Why aren’t you going to EHX? I promised everyone on the Life|blog that you’d be there” and he was all like “You’ll have to get a cardboard cut out of me, then.”

More bad news: Marketing caught me trying to slip a Cardboard Cutout purchase order in with all of the other materials, and put the kibosh on the idea.

So, here’s how I’m going to make you all whole. You come to EHX. Come to the big booth. Find me:

I’m usually in the kitchen vignette, by the way. Say to me: “Hey Pete, didn’t you promise us that we could meet the Guy who Got Traded to Training for a Scanner?” and with those magic words, I will silently reach into a drawer behind me and produce for you an autographed photo of the Guy Who Got Traded To Training for a Scanner.

That’s the best I can do. in the end, Life|ware 2.0 for Windows Vista is the star of the booth, so perhaps it’s best GWGTTTFAS won’t be around to upstage anyone.

See you in Florida.

Good times.